End of Summer Romance

Hello Bloggers! I know, I know, it's been awhile...let me catch you up on all the festivities of these last few months. Where to start you ask? Well, I have to begin by saying I have been reminiscing quite a bit lately due to my rapidly approaching 30th birthday on the horizon. Thirty is such a milestone birthday for most women, although some women may think of it as a death sentence or even descend into some sort of "oh shit, I have to dye my gray hair now" shock. But for me the experience has been honestly different, I have been feeling all kinds of confidence. The kind that makes you whistle as you walk down the street knowing tomorrow will be filled with even more joy then yesterday. Confidence I can't explain but you just feel it in yourself, your body (okay maybe this one is a lie) and most of all in your sexuality. Your sexual appetite peaks at 30! What else could a girl ask for right? You are the captain of your own ship and you are sailing to an awesome destination! I'm really looking forward to this day, the day I turn 30. A good friend of mine described her 30th birthday as being filled with feelings of nostalgia mixed in with hope for the future. She suggested I make a list of things I hope to accomplish in the next 5 years.

Taking this brilliant advice, I thought of things that could go on my list and many ideas started floating around in my head. Now you can see why I got side tracked, I ended up making a list of all my romantic encounters instead not a short list at all! I thought to myself it's probably a good idea to expand this blog into a book version, I'm currently working on this and will be posting little blurbs here and there. I'd love to get some feed back, since I'm going way back in time, 13 years to be exact. Are you ready for the ride?

But for now I will leave you with this little tasty delight, I have left my joy crushing job for the lovely world of business management. I'm currently looking into grad schools to begin a new career and I'm in the process of moving. Moving through life, rolling with the punches and making the best out of every situation. My cousin (bless his heart) has left this world behind to move onto the next in March and if he taught me anything, his greatest accomplishment was to teach those around him to live in the moment. Enjoy every minute because it might be your last. Love as much as you can and let those people that you love know exactly how much you love them. Tell them everyday if you have to! Because all we have is today, so fill that day with all the joy and love your little heart can handle.

More than someone new

On my quest to move on from "smoking hot guy" I realized...I'm still young and I've still got it. I never really appreciated my pimping skills until now. I actually didn't consider myself the kind of person that had pimping skills in the first place! In the early years of my dating career, I was always the aggressor. I'm naturally an aggressive person, it has taken me YEARS to tame the beast. I've had many people tell me that this is not a positive trait, to be aggressive and a girl. To that I say..."go fly a kite" I like my aggressive nature. I have learned to take this aggression out on physical exercise (I'm getting to the point I promise) and use what's left over to lure men in. How do you lure them in you ask? Easy, just be a girl. Bat your eyelashes, smile, make eye contact and watch them chase you like crazy hunters. It is not magic, it's biology. Men are the hunters and women are the gatherers. We as women have many roles in society but what we are naturally gifted at is gathering tons of information and adapting to our surroundings. Men are naturals at hunting women and making them happy. Honestly, all they want to do is make us happy and the only thing we have to do to trigger this instinct is to share our femininity with them. They just want to bathe in it and be around us. I know it sounds so textbook easy but, in the dating world it can be quite a challenge.

Since, I decided to put this hunter/gatherer theory to the test I started to go out more. I wanted to observe men in their natural habitat and test my theory out. What better testing ground is there then a baseball game? The guys there are already having fun and their testosterone is pumping. In some miraculous way I managed to get suite tickets to a Dodger game, I was so excited to go to my first baseball game! I was even more excited when I walked into the suite and saw 2 guys I have had my eye on earlier this year. They came to the game together, apparently they are friends. It was like someone handed me a present with a big red bow on it and called it Christmas in September. One of the guys is very funny, charming and has a great personality we will call him "nerd boy" his friend is all of these things plus a little pretentious and arrogant. We will call his friend "the wingman". The entire game I made eye contact, smiled and laughed at their jokes when the opportunity arose. Next thing I know, the game is over and everyone is going to the dugout bar. At the bar "nerd boy" and "the wingman" make plans with my friends and I to go to a hot downtown bar. Everyone gets in their cars to race through the streets of Silver Lake and arrive in downtown. This bar is very happening for a tuesday night. There are pool tables, a live band and an artist creating portraits of people right before your eyes!

Even though the bartender spilled an entire glass of beer on me, I had the best time. Both guys were very attentive and nice. I wasn't sure which one was interested in me. "The wingman" bought a round of 10 year old whiskey (which was quite impressive) and "nerd boy" pointed out some guy trying to talk to me. While I was in the middle of a conversation with both of them. So I was a little confused. Finally "the wingman" did his job. When "nerd boy" went to the bathroom he said "I think my friend might be a little too drunk to drive" "You might have to take him home, or better yet take him to your home". Thanks for straightening everything out "wingman"! After that "the wingman" walked home and "nerd boy" stayed to hangout with me and my friends. We had a great conversation, he wanted to know all about me. He even kissed my shoulder and put his arm around me. He basically found any reason to touch me while we were talking, it was very sweet. By the end of the night I was sold on "nerd boy".

After he walked us to our car, "nerd boy" and I said our goodbyes and didn't exchange numbers only screen names. (By the way screen names is the modern day way of saying "I'm just not that into you"). We chatted online for a week and "nerd boy" never made a move. What's a girl to think? Well, there is always "the wingman" right?

The Bitch is Back!

It seemed like I had a date with destiny when I asked "smoking hot guy" to watch my cats while I was out of town for a couple of days. It was nice to get away from the hustle and bustle of the city. Even if it was just for a long weekend, I needed a new perspective to deal with this whole situation. After the "strip blackjack" night, we talked as usual but no dates. My patience was wearing thin and I needed some space to figure things out. "Bulletproof" by La Roux had become my new theme song and I was smoking cigarettes most nights. I needed to wash the boy out of my hair especially since there was a big possibility he would be moving. I was hoping for a nice "distraction" on my getaway but, no such luck. Little did I know what awaited me when I came back was much juicier!

The night I went to pick up my keys from "smoking hot guy" I put on a brave face because I didn't know what to expect. He gives me my keys and casually mentions he is getting laid off at the end of the month and plans to move to Israel! Since when is Israel on the top five vacation destination spots list? Naturally I'm in shock, I don't even have room to be a supportive friend at this point. So I ask what any girl would ask....how long do you plan on living in Israel? His answer: "I don't know....a couple of years?" I just clammed up and didn't really have a readable reaction after that. What can I say, he laid a bomb on me! It was an "all of a sudden" kind of bomb which caused me to feel hurt and totally shocked at the same time. He kept trying to read the expression on my face and kept asking me if I was okay? All I could say was "I'm okay" I got in my car and left. It was right then and there that I decided I had to let him go.

The sobbing and over analyzing that us women are SO good at, only lasted a week. There really is no point with this one. Strangely enough it was easy, kind of a relief from the holding pattern. I thought I would be hysterically crying and down in the dumps for awhile. But, instead I couldn't wait to get out there again and meet someone new. I was in full rebound mode and I've never felt so alive and full of hope. I was back in the game! I guess that is what 11 years of dating in Los Angeles does to you.

Could there be love after cats?

I know I have been on a MAJOR hiatus with this blog but, I didn't want to bore you with anymore cat stories so let me update you quickly. The cat date was interesting ... "smoking hot guy" fell in love with my cat. It's almost as if I didn't exist. Nothing really major happened that night. We did bond over some personal things he shared with me and he opened up in a way he never had before. A couple of weeks later he went away on vacation and asked me to care for his cat while he was gone.

I have never spoken to him so many times on the phone in the 9 months that I have known him until the week and a half that he was on vacation. There was one call on a Saturday night at 1am local time. The reason? To check on his cat. Seriously? You call me from Hawaii on a Saturday night to check on your cat? Who does that? And a final call on a Tuesday from New York to tell me he was going to call on Sunday when he got back so we could see each other. I think I got asked out on a date that time. I wasn't sure because it went something like this.... ME: "So how is NY?" SMOKING HOT GUY: "Great, I'm having a wonderful time" Blah, blah, blah, ME: "I hope you are going out on the town to have some fun" SMOKING HOT GUY: "I'm on the train on my way to meet my friend" Blah, blah, blah....."So what are you doing on Sunday?" "Do you want to see me?"
ME: "Yeah sure"

The anticipation builds all week, I cannot wait until Sunday. I get a text from him saying he missed his morning flight and is trying to get on the next one. I let him know that if it's too late we can hangout some other time. He insists on seeing me. I'm very impressed at this point because I have NEVER seen him respond to me in this way. He arrives, picks up his car and heads straight over to my place. As soon as I open the door, there he is smoking a cigarette with a huge smile on his face. I give him the biggest hug ever and he compliments me on my t-shirt. He starts telling me a story about this gay flight attendant that was hitting on him during the flight. I can't stop laughing and he casually throws in " You should move to New York". I go with the flow and express how much I like New York and that I have many friends over there. So we go inside and he tells me that there is a possible job opportunity out there for him and he might be moving. My heart is totally crushed at this point, I'm not the kind of girl that would beg a guy to stay with her. I want him to be happy but, I don't want to stand in the way of his happiness. I'm trying to be as supportive as humanly possible when he tells me how much he liked New York and he can't wait to go back. So I try to lighten the mood by suggesting we play cards and drink. He agrees and tries to get me drunk. We start playing all kinds of games until we run out of ideas. And then he suggests "Strip Blackjack" I said what the hell, this should be interesting. He loses, clothes come off. I loose and even more clothes come off. So I'm sitting at the table in my bra and panties, he is sitting at the table in his pants and I LOSE!!!!

There is no way I am taking off any more of my clothes, he tries to persuade me and I say no. So he calls a truce and when he puts his hand out to shake my hand he gets up, so I get up. We shake hands, then he pulls me in for a hug and then....

A KISS!!!! Finally!!! Thank you Jesus!!! Someone up there is listening!!!!

Things start to get hot and heavy....I immediately kill the mood and start asking questions. Because the cards are out on the table literally and I'm not stepping another inch forward until I know exactly what's going on. So I ask him what are we doing? He answers me, "This can be whatever you want it to be." Never the kind of thing a girl wants to hear when she's in her underwear making out with a "smoking hot guy". After a long drawn out conversation we both admit that we like each other and he tells me, he doesn't think he would be a good boyfriend to me right now because his whole life is up in the air and that he doesn't want to hurt me. This makes total logical sense and is a completely valid reason. If you are a man but, I am not a man I am a woman. I understand where he is coming from but at the same time I can't even be mad at him because he's being completely truthful! What do I do? And this is the question that I have been asking myself all month. I still have no answer. So I ask you, my bloggers out there in blog land. What would you do? If you met someone that has almost every quality you have been searching for and it feels so right when you are together. I'm old enough to know not to throw a good fish like this back in the sea but I've had too many bad dating experiences to make a stupid decision at this point. Please post comments!

Goldie's Date

I am back from the wilderness otherwise known as "camping" to some people. It was definitely an experience, the relaxation and company was nice to have for an entire 4 days. Unfortunately you can take the girl out of the city, but not the city out of the girl. The battery on my phone kept dying, I hardly had a signal and I spent nights on the camp grounds texting "smoking hot guy" for updates on my cats. Luckily, he was taking good care of them and I felt at ease. Monday morning rolls around, we leave the campsite and the first purchase of the morning is Starbucks coffee. I needed caffeine for the long drive home.

As I'm racing down all the freeways, making my way to the west side. I can hardly contain myself as I dial "smoking hot guy's" phone number to let him know I'm on my way. I arrive to my destination, freshly showered and perfumed ready to meet him at the door. Of course he answers the door in a scruffy beard, wearing cargo pants and a collared shirt looking hot as ever! I'm trying not to jump out of my skin as he compliments me on my outfit. I'm expecting him to just hand me my keys and parking pass so I can be on my merry way. Hold on for this one people.....he invites me in to meet his cat and introduces me to his MOM!!!

I totally wasn't expecting that one at all! So I listen carefully to how he introduces me to his Mom to see if it is a big deal to him. I was thinking okay we are just friends, his mom is over vacuuming his apartment (which is kinda weird) she didn't really look up too long from what she was cleaning to say hello. No biggie right? Well, he didn't say "Mom this is my friend" He said "Mom this is...." and then my name. I didn't think anything of it because I won't allow myself to make conclusions. "Smoking hot guy" and I moved our conversation to the kitchen, I continued to cuddle his cat as he elaborated on how much he likes my female cat. He says she is welcome over at his place for a play date anytime. So I throw the ball right back at him and say..."sure let me know when". Was this his move? I thought to myself....apparently it was.

A couple days later we run into each other and start talking about what's new. He complimented me on my glass ring, I told him I like glass jewelry and he says to me "then you must like topaz right"? Is he seriously shopping for me in his head already? That's a little to premature to assume right? Anything is possible at this point. So I mentioned I started playing soccer on an all girls team. He says to me "be careful it's a rough sport, don't you have to use your chest a lot"? "Be careful with your chest!" All this time I thought he was a hip or butt guy, turns out he's a boob guy! I had it wrong all along! Don't worry "smoking hot guy" the girls are locked and loaded while I'm playing soccer. Nothing to worry about.

All of a sudden we get on the subject of my cats again, he mentions how he wants to adopt Goldie (my female cat). And FINALLY he makes the date! Sunday 9pm I have a play date with his cat. I cannot wait! I hope something blog worthy happens. And it was all because of a cat, I can tell he is feeling braver, maybe next time there will be a real date?

An extra set of keys

Lately I've been having this undeniable itch for change. I feel like my life is finally stable but boring at the same time. I don't really have the burning desire to party like a Rockstar every weekend like I used to. I rather spend quality time with family and friends doing more low key things like, sushi and sake (Japanese booze). Whenever I get this feeling I know my spirit is restless and it's time for a change of scenery. Off to camping for me it is, as I'm planning away on important details like bikinis and floppy hats to wear by the lake. It dawned on me that I still had not found a cat sitter! Who was going to keep an eye on my babies while I'm gone? Naturally, the first person that pops into my head for this kind of responsibility is...you guessed it "smoking hot guy". I was a little hesitant to ask at first, after all it is a little presumptuous of me to think a person that works 50 to 60 hours a week has time to or even wants to feed my cats for 4 days. My instincts said otherwise so, I asked him anyway. Much to my surprise, (after he finished tracing the shape of my hips with his eyes quickly) he said yes and then added "I'll even feed them too". Woohooo!! He didn't think twice about his answer, I was stunned and excited at the same time.

I figured okay he will probably forget about his agreement during the week and bring it up again Friday when I give him the key to my place right? He is a guy after all, usually if you make plans with a guy, he will call you up on that day to figure out details. I was wrong, the first thing to come out of his mouth Monday is "So when am I going to get my key?" Rookie mistake, this guy was raised by his mother (God bless you "smoking hot guy's" mom wherever you may be) I forget, sometimes your son makes sense to the opposite sex! Well, being the "together" gal that I am, I don't have a copy of my keys. I have one set, the original set. So I tell "smoking hot guy" "You will get my keys on Friday when I'm done using them" and he says to me with a concerned look on his face, "You really should have an extra set of keys just in case, you never know" And I answered "Well I don't". Doesn't he know that getting my keys and my parking pass back from him is an excuse for us to spend some alone time together? I mean you can cut the sexual tension with a knife, when we are alone we can melt butter, possibly cream cheese even. So now, the imposing question is this... Do I give him a copy of my keys and he can give them back whenever or do I give him my original keys and tell it like it is when I pick them up? Will he finally make a move and ask me out on a real date? I DON'T KNOW! And why does he want my keys so quickly? First we go on a fake date and now he wants my keys? This non-relationship/friendship is moving too fast. Or is it reaching a whole new level?

If I give him a copy of my keys he can be my key keeper in case I ever lock myself out of my apartment. But, if I give him my original keys I have to pray he's not busy when I get back and we can really talk. What's a girl to do? Comments or suggestions please!

Russians, Frenchmen and Gays oh my!

First of all, I would like to send a big THANK YOU! To all my blog readers, your support and suggestions mean a lot to me. I took one suggestion especially to heart and that is on the subject of "smoking hot guy". Now, I can't get into too much detail because after all this is the internet. So here goes...I met "smoking hot guy" a couple of months ago, I would describe him as the most beautiful spirit I have come across in a long time. It's not even about what he looks like (forget the killer smile and gorgeous green eyes for a moment). He has morals, he's very kind, grounded, thoughtful, spiritual AND wants to make a difference in this world. Not only do we have a lot in common but, we also share the same values and views on life. How could I not keep him around?

Now you understand why I accepted his invitation to dinner many months ago, around the time when we first met. It was then, that he told me he wasn't ready for a relationship. As soon as I heard the words come out of his mouth, I felt like someone shot me in the chest with a harpoon gun. Relationship???? I was trying to figure out if I was on a date or not. That's what was going on in my head. So I gave him the benefit of the doubt and continued to be his friend erasing the idea of an "us" out of my mind. I'm 28....I know how this goes by now. Fast forward 5 months and you are up to speed. I was initially shocked when I realized he was jealous of "3 date guy" out of nowhere, he was ALL up on my nuts! Winking, blowing kisses, sending flirty text messages, undressing me with his eyes...the works. I'd never seen this side of him before I have to confess, I kinda like it! But, I decided to just keep meeting other guys because I'm a firm believer that if a guy wants to be with you, he will make it happen.

Well, for the sake of "research" I went out this weekend to a Russian bar, I was determined to meet a distraction at the very least. 3 cocktails and a couple of hottie sightings later...I met a sweaty Frenchman in a silk shirt that had enough sweat on it to last through an entire match of World Cup soccer! (Note to self: Don't wear a silk shirt in a crowded bar, everyone can see your sweat) He asked me and my friend if we were French, we said no. Then he asked us if we spoke French, again we said no. Finally he said, "Where are you girls from?" and we answered "We're Latinas". Then, he proceeded to introduce us to his friend Jean Luke who was supposedly from Guatemala. Jean Luke, ditched us as soon as he met us to go dance with the skankiest girl in the joint. On no wait, it gets better! Out on the smoking patio we met med school boy (22) and law school boy (23) all I have to say is, I won't bore you with the details because ONE conversation with these guys reminded me why I hated dating in my early 20s.

Feeling still hopeful....Sunday night, I had dinner with my cousin (who is gay) and attended West Hollywood's Gay Pride Festival. I didn't know where to look there were hot guys EVERYWHERE but, none of them bat for my team. ::SIGH:: I felt like a diabetic in an ice cream shop! This weekend was not a total bust, I ran into my pole dancing instructor and discovered that we both share a love for gay guy friends. For now, I am going to count my blessings and enjoy the new friendships and opportunities that are popping up on my path to true love. By the way, "3 date guy" texted me last night. What's up with that?